There are just some things you should not do on a first date. Avoid these faux pas and your date will be smooth sailing. Some of this entry applies to men, but for the most part, women and men should avoid these no-no’s:
Being too chivalrous – Going overboard or treating a woman over-the-top on a first date can be overwhelming for us. Although it is nice to make a great impression, especially if you want a second date, being over-the-top may actually drive a woman away. Opening doors, pulling out chairs, and paying for the date are the standard polite practices. Anything more can scare a woman off.
Choosing a bad venue location – Obviously, a first date should be about getting to know the other person in a comfortable setting. Choosing a bad venue to have the date could have disastrous results. Also, when choosing a place to have a first date, take into consideration what the other person may or may not like. For instance, if you know your date does not like the outdoors, do not make plans to go on a hike. If your date likes art, you might take him or her to an art museum. Go out of your way to make that other person feel comfortable.
Being wishy-washy – On a first date, one should be decisive. Being “wishy-washy” really leads to nowhere. It really doesn’t do any good when you do not know what you want. For example, it really drives a person crazy when at dinner you are ready to order, and the other person still cannot figure out what they want. This is when being indecisive can be annoying. Or if you are on a date and your date asks you what you want to do, do you say, “I don’t know. It doesn’t matter to me,” or do you actually tell the other person you feel like going dancing or walking along the beach, etc. It makes things a lot easier if you have something in mind and you speak up about it.
Being too honest – You really do not want to be too honest on a first date. The first date is about getting to know each other, not divulging life-long secrets. There are certain topics one should
Constantly interrupting – When you interrupt a person in mid-conversation, not only is it extremely rude, it can disrupt the flow of conversation. If you have something to say, or a comment to add, wait until the other person is finished speaking before you put your two cents in. Your date will appreciate you more if you actually listen to what he or she has to say before making a comment. This shows you are a good listener.
Dressing inappropriately – You should always dress your best when you go on your first date, and you should always dress for the occasion. For example, if you know you will be going to dinner at a nice restaurant, dress up in your best attire. Do not show up wearing just anything or wearing your most comfortable pair of jeans. You need to dress appropriately for the occasion. Obviously, if you know you will be hanging outdoors or going to a concert, wear comfortable, casual clothing. A nice dinner constitutes wearing a nice suite or nice slacks and a shirt. In addition, if you plan to surprise your date, warn them beforehand what the proper dress code is. I once went on a date where my date did not inform me we were going to a theme park attraction so I ended up wearing high heels on my date when I should have been wearing comfortable sneakers or sandals. Needless to say, I was not all too happy when I was not warned beforehand.
Flirting with someone other than your date – This is a huge no-no. If you are on date, do not make it your intention to flirt with someone else other than your date, regardless of whether the date is going smoothly or not. Even “checking out” someone else can totally ruin a date.
Bad hygiene – You would be surprised to hear how some people are just totally clueless as to how to keep up good hygiene. A first date should include a good long bath or shower, a haircut if needed, a shave if needed, nail trimming, and at least 10 minutes of brushing your teeth and tongue. Also, a good eye brow tweezing session is in stored and possibly some nose hair tweezing. You basically need to appear your best on a first date so good grooming takes precedent.
Discussing taboos – When it comes to discussing taboos, stay clear away from this subject at all costs. This includes subjects on old ex-girlfriends and ex-boyfriends, religion, and politics. Discussing anything related to these topics is a definite faux pas. These are topics that can be discussed later, but definitely not on the first date.
Not offering to pay – I have always believed a man should always offer to pay for a first date, no matter what the circumstances are. Even if the woman asked the man out on a date, a man should still offer to pay. You will score brownie points all the way, if you reveal your generous side from the get go.
Being late – On a first date, you should never ever be late. It is extremely rude to keep your date waiting. Being tardy is a sign of disrespect --- you are essentially letting your date know their time is not valuable enough to show up on time. I personally find this really offensive. If a guy is late on a first date without a valid excuse, I normally do not agree to a second date.
Drinking and being hammered – Although alcohol may be consumed on a first date, stick to having a two drink limit. You definitely do not want to get drunk and wasted on a first date. Acting like a jackass will not get you a second date. Getting so wasted you cannot even take your date home is a definite no-no. Getting so drunk you do not even remember your date is a huge faux pas. Having two drinks and nothing more will loosen you up but will not take you overboard.
Talking on your cell phone – It is also very rude to take phone calls while on your date. Keep your phone off or silent. If you absolutely have to make a call, make sure you step away so your date does not see. You can excuse yourself to the bathroom and take your call then. Cell phones are distracting so do not under any circumstances (unless you are a doctor that requires an emergency response) take a call or make a call while you are out on your first date.
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